So born and brought up in Hong Kong, married in the States to now living with two kids and my spouse in Mumbai, India – all I do is compare the three.
I try to be positive and put aside a lot of things but now I am at a point of frustration. When I used to watch Hindi movies as a child, I did not think that these problems ‘actually’ occur. I would think ‘it’s just a movie, how can someone be so cruel to another person’. I mean we have been brought up to be honest, loving, caring and compassionate. But then when you come to a country like India, all of this means nothing.
Let me make a list of things that I have experienced which may not be a big deal to many but have actually taken over my life in an extremely negative way. So let’s start:
1) a bank manager has been harrassing me for almost 2.5 years regarding my dad’s death claim. I have gone to the bank over twenty times and everytime I go back, he promises me that it’s the last thing I need to claim my money but that last thing has never come. I have cried, pleaded, fought but he doesn’t care. He blames me all the time. He blames me because he claims I have taken it to easy. I love 1.5 hours away from the bank, I had taken it easy because I was pregnant and traveling back and forth on the roads of Mumbai are a terrible nightmare not forgetting the awful traffic and pollution. So when I was pregnant, after my third month I almost gave up. All this whole, he knew I was pregnant. After having my daughter, I rested for three months and started the back and forth again. I had a lawyer who was trying to help me but gave up because he said the bank manager was extremely difficult. Then I tried by myself which was worse because of course everyone has to take advantage of an NRI girl coming “alone” to the bank. He’s sent me to court for work alone. Most horrible experience of my life with the lecherous men there and so I finally found a competent accountant to help me. Whenever the accountant comes with me to the bank, he says ‘this is normal’. Normal? Seriously. Normal? This is not normal. This is harassment in every way possible. If I was not blessed with sufficient amount of money, I’d be lying down outside the bank begging to let my claim go through. This isn’t normal by any means. I tried to shorten this experience but it’s so tormenting that there is no way to shorten it. This is Syndicate Bank just FYI.
2) Designers – promise A and give you Z. Yes, literally you ask for North you get south. You ask for black you get white. They are so incompetent it is frustrating. They cheat you off your money. They are very good at that.
3) Lying about timing. Like their time is more valuable than anyone else’s time. You say 2, you’ll be lucky if they even come by 3. I’ve tried to go late for occasions like a house party, a gathering, or dance rehearsals and no matter how late I’ve tried to go, I’m always the first one 😂. Yeh it’s funny as I type this but seriously, my blood boils mainly because I’m being laughed at for being punctual 🤷.
4) Standing in lines – ok in short, don’t ever bother standing in a line in Mumbai like even in sophisticated places like the airport because you’ll be a joke. You’ll miss your flight 🙂
5) Rickshaws – choosing their passengers based on the destination. First of all, there are millions of rickshaws here but when you desperately need one, no one will agree to take you. When I was pregnant, 5 rickshawwalas refused to take me 10 minutes away. Finally, I ended up swearing and beating this one rickshaw and he had to run off because he got scared. I literally lost my mind.
Yes, if you think I’m crazy writing the above, I probably am.
I’ve been meaning to write this for a while now.
This country has no hope with the poverty and pollution, I don’t see anything good coming out of these people. They refuse to change, they are ignorant and are extremely selfish.
I love my friends and family here though. Won’t find such friends in any part of the world. But I wish that was enough for me to want to live here and riase my children here. My children deserve a better life!